Baptisms, Weddings, Memorials, Funerals

Baptism

Holy Baptism and Holy Eucharist are the Sacraments commanded by Christ. “Holy Baptism is full initiation by water and the Holy Spirit into Christ's Body the Church” (Prayer Book, p. 298). “In it we are buried with Christ in his death. By it we share in his resurrection. Through it we are reborn by the Holy Spirit.” (p. 306).

We welcome your expression of interest in Holy Baptism at St. Bartholomew’s, whether for yourself, for your child, or for your infant. Preparation for baptism includes meeting with one of our clergy and exploring the meaning of Holy Baptism for you. We delight in discussing Holy Baptism, its meaning, and the role of sponsors or godparents.

We also have a preliminary walk-through so that all who will participate in the Baptism will know who will do what, where, when, and with whom. Please call one of the parish clergy at 858-487-2159 to explore your questions and hopes for Holy Baptism.

– The Rev. Fred Thayer, Rector

Weddings

If you are reading this, chances are you have made one of the great decisions of life—the decision to marry. If so, congratulations! May you become one in heart and soul and live in fidelity and peace. In marriage, a man and a woman commit themselves to a lifelong union “in heart, body, and mind … intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is God’s will, for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord.” Marriage is a sacrament administered to one another by the couple; it is an outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace. The sacramental nature of marriage involves infinitely more than the wedding ceremony in which a marriage is solemnized. “Therefore marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.” (Book of Common Prayer, p. 423)

If you are considering holding the celebration and blessing of your marriage at St. Bartholomew’s, you should begin your consultation and planning with the rector, Fr. Fred Thayer. The Church is concerned that the sacrament of Holy Matrimony be administered faithfully and reverently. Either Fr. Thayer or another of the clergy on staff at St. Bartholomew’s will emphasize this understanding in pre-marital instruction sessions. The goal is to help a couple reflect upon who they are and the direction of their life together. In pre-marital sessions new beginnings are anticipated and the opportunity is taken to talk about the practical matters of married life in the context of Christian faith and practice. At least three sessions, usually with the officiating priest, are required prior to the ceremony. Additional sessions may be required. A meeting with the organist is usually also scheduled.

Although canon law requires that the intention of a couple to marry be communicated to the priest at least thirty days before the ceremony, proper preparation normally takes six months or longer. More time must be allowed when a prior marriage has ended in divorce, as an application for the consent of the Bishop for re-marriage must be prepared, filed, considered, and acted upon. This process is a positive one; it is intended to help couples avoid repeating patterns and decisions that are detrimental to a healthy marriage. It is a priest’s duty to refuse to officiate when, in his or her judgment, a couple does not intend to, or is unable to enter the lifelong union of Holy Matrimony demonstrating the “heart, mind and will to accomplish this union” and proposing “to seek the help of God thereto.”

Although most weddings at St. Bartholomew’s are those of parish members and their families, we also provide wedding services for couples living in the area who plan to join our church, who are members of an Episcopal congregation elsewhere, or who are actively involved in another Christian community. The Episcopal Church requires that at least one of the parties has been baptized.

Please call our office at (858) 487-2159 to set up an appointment and to learn more about weddings at St. Bartholomew’s. You’ll probably have questions about many things, including flowers, music, and photography. We look forward to answering your questions and assisting you in planning a wedding day that expresses beautifully and clearly the love and aspirations you share as you begin a lifelong marriage. Again, congratulations!

– The Rev. Fred Thayer, Rector

Memorial Services and Funerals

When a loved one is lost, the St. Bartholomew’s clergy are available to support and comfort family and friends and to help plan a service of celebration of life in witness to the promise within Christ’s Easter victory over death. By family preference, the committal may either follow the memorial service directly or be held at a later date, whether at a cemetery or in the columbarium on the St. Bartholomew’s campus. Complete information about our columbarium — a memorial garden with niches for cremated remains — is available.

For those of us who can still take the opportunity to plan our own memorial service or funeral, we can within its design make our own desires known in advance. Our planning can be a wonderful final gift to those we love when they must later carry out these arrangements.

St. Bartholomew’s church and clergy are here to help all the people of God and the community, in times of peace and in times of need.

Rev. Dr. Judith Allison
jallison@stbartschurch.org
858-487-2159 ext. 311
Or
Rev. Cole Gruberth
cgruberth@stbartschurch.org
858-487-2159 ext. 308